Becca Jane St Clair

I created an Excel spreadsheet to track our grocery store spending throughout the year, and my first month is complete. We have spent £173.18 this month on groceries ONLY. I filter out of the total delivery charges (£17.50 for the month), toiletries (nothing, bought everything at Boots or Wilkos), household goods (laundry soap, etc. £15.21 this month), pet supplies (£2.29 this month as all Prudence needed was a box of wet food), alcohol (£0), and misc (like if we pick up a DVD at the grocery store. £0 this month)

I’m debating about adding onto the sheet all times we go shopping for toiletries (boots/wilkos/etc), as I am interested in knowing what we spend on those things. I might still have my receipts from this month, or I can price things out individually and work out the total. It was less than £25, but more than usual because we ran out of everything this month including Tim’s aftershave.

Still, £173 isn’t bad. We’ve always aimed to spend less than £200. And yesterday was the most expensive delivery because we defrosted the freezer and needed to restock it.

Paying for delivery annoys me sometimes, but I can justify it, easily. If Tim isn’t available to drive me to the shop, I’d have to take a bus at £4.80 Return. Delivery fees hover between £3.50 and £4.50, depending on how fast I book it. Petrol would be negligible, since we live fairly close to most of the shops (though I bet Asda would be more in petrol than the delivery fee), but when you think about how much time you spend in the grocery stores…..the delivery fee is well worth it!

Here’s hoping I can do better in February, though. Ideally, I’d rather groceries be down in the £125-150 range for the month, especially since we will have houseguests in April and May that will add extras! (Dear houseguests: No, I am not asking you to buy groceries while you are here! Stop thinking that!!). We also are going on holiday in June, so groceries become a little iffy then, too. Even with camping, we still wind up doing a daily shop and it can add up since you never have a stocked pantry to work with.

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

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This is MissM:

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Lately, Miss M has been gaining attention all over the internet for this photo (even though she posted it months back). And every time I read some of the comments, I can’t help but jump in and talk about Miss M, because she is my friend.

When I call her my friend, I mean it. She is my friend. She is not an “internet friend” (though we did meet via a community on LiveJournal years ago!). Miss M and I have met-up on several occasions. I have been to her house, I have met her fiancé, and I have fussed at her kitties. My husband, mother, and one of my cousins have also met her. We call each other on the phone (thank you Skype!), we text (when it’s working), and we keep in touch via email, facebook, and twitter when we’re not commenting on each other’s blogs. I helped her start up PhoenixFunds, and I continue to support her and search for help for her. Therefore, when I comment and say “Miss M is a friend of mine”, I really do mean friend. And yes, I know what the M stands for. No, I’m not going to tell you. While Miss M appreciates all the support she is given, she does not want her full legal name out there on the internet, and I respect that.

As a long-time friend of Miss M, I know what she’s been through. She’s not kidding when she said she tried all other avenues for assistance.

But here’s the sucky part for her. It’s not over. Sure, she had her surgery in October, but the thing with major surgery is it takes ages to get over. Heck, I only had minor surgery on my armpit and it knocked me down for months afterwards. Miss M had major surgery and is looking at at least a year to a full recovery. On top of the months she already was ill. So by the time next October rolls around, she will have been out of work for a year and a half. And while she’s in recovery, she needs to see her doctors. Her insurance costs $250/month. This is on top of having to pay for the part of her surgery that wasn’t covered by the insurance. She owes around $10,000 for the surgery, and for her ER visit before she was able to gain insurance. She’s in a bit of a catch-22 — if she doesn’t pay $250/mo for her insurance, she has to start paying out of pocket to see the doctors. If she doesn’t pay back on the $10k, it goes into collections and puts her farther into debt making it impossible to afford the $250, and if she pays out of pocket to see the doctors, that adds even more to the $10k, never mind the fact that the doctor will want some of that money up front. And if she misses a month of paying $250, she goes right back to the beginning in terms of her deductible, which means shelling out $1000 up front before it starts to cover things.

And then you hear the “advice” – cut out Starbucks, drive a less expensive car, get rid of satellite TV, get rid of your iPhone, etc etc….but the thing is….Miss M doesn’t have or do any of those. She’s not a Starbucks junkie, her car is an older model (which means it needs to be repaired more frequently, which costs money…see? Catch-22), she doesn’t have satellite TV, and she doesn’t have an iPhone. She has an iPod touch that her fiancé gave to her several years ago because it was given to him at work as a Christmas gift, and he knew she wanted one. Her mobile phone is not snazzy, but she can’t get rid of it because since she drives an older car that is prone to breaking down, she needs to be able to call for help when she needs it (catch-22 again). And honestly? Cutting out a $30 bill isn’t going to magic $10,000.

I also know for a fact that Miss M participates in as many points sites as possible and earns points she can cash in for other things, like meals out, Amazon gift cards, her Disney pass, etc. Nothing that this woman does is done for the hell of it, and if she has any “disposable income”, well, I know it goes towards supplies for her business, food for her cats, or other necessities (you know, clothing, toiletries, food…).

It hurts me when people on other websites that have picked up her photo and story make nasty comments about her. I know I’m preaching to the choir here, because if you’re reading this entry, you are probably a friend and have probably read my other posts about Miss M, but if you’ve googled for more information about her, I hope you’ve stumbled upon this.

Ways to Help
I am NOT asking you to donate money to aid Miss M, but if you’re in the market for some jewellery, please visit her site or Etsy shop. Valentine’s Day is coming, and I can vouch that her pieces are stunning. I myself own a tree of life and snowman earrings, my mom has a custom bracelet, and my mother-in-law received a nestlace (bird’s nest pendant) that Miss M personalized with an un-heard of SEVEN birthstone pearls for her children and children-in-laws. I also have many one of a kind pieces Miss M has gifted to me over the years, including some lovely purple earrings I wear all the time and a red and gold beaded bookmark.

If you do want to donate, you can do so via both PayPal and GoFundMe.

Other links you might find useful:

Her Blog: http://giveneyestosee.com/blog

PhoenixFunds: http://PhoenixFunds.etsy.com

PhoenixFireDesigns on Etsy: http://PhoenixFireDesigns.etsy.com

PhoenixFire Designs: http://www.phoenixfiredesigns.com

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog.]

Yesterday was probably the most nerve-wracking and important day in our lives. As if getting married and applying for a Spousal Visa wasn’t bad enough, it only lasts for 2 years (technically, 28 months to give extra time in case you arrived more than a month after your visa was issued). To stay in the UK longer, you currently need to apply for ILR (Indefinite Leave to Remain AKA Permanent Residency). You can apply by post or in-person. The in-person appointment has a heftier fee, but it’s an immediate decision and saves weeks of finger nail biting. We decided on an in-person appointment for peace of mind, and also just in case we decide to go abroad on a long weekend (we’ve toyed with a weekend in Paris, but might put it off so we can save more for a trip to Austria in June).

My appointment was for 11:15 at the Sheffield PEO office and the appointment information states you should arrive 30 minutes before your slot. We decided to take public transportation the whole way starting with a bus at 7:40AM out of the village. Our train was running early and we actually arrived at the PEO office with an hour to spare.

Getting through security was an ordeal. There was a couple behind us complaining that their appointment was in 10 minutes and I couldn’t help but wonder why they hadn’t read the information on the website! To get through security, we had to take the batteries out of our mobile phones to show the inside. We were allowed to put the phones back together, but we had to leave them off the whole time we were in the PEO. Tim made the best blunder of the day by forgetting his dress shoes were work issued and had steel toes! Fortunately, security just waved him through after I said “it’s the shoes”.

We checked in early and were quite surprised to get called up to the desk within 5 minutes. Our case worker, Joe, looked at my application and asked me when I filled it out. I told him I had printed it off the website a few days prior and he said “everyone’s been telling me that, but this is the old form”. He then handed me the new form and asked me to fill it out. There are NO differences between the old form and the new form, save for the fact that the bottom of the new form says “10/2011” and the old form “04/2011”. Apparently, the website hadn’t been updated with the new form and everyone coming in this week has had to re-do their form on arrival. I told the man at reception I had finished the new application, and before we even found seats in the crowded lobby, we were called to the desk again.

This time, Joe went through our entire packet. He asked me where in New York I was from, and I puzzled him by answering “I’m not”. I then explained how I was born in Brooklyn, but my parents moved when I was a baby. Surprisingly, he knew where Princeton was after he didn’t know where Hightstown was. He checked to make sure we had the required documents, transferred it into a plastic document folder, and told us to proceed to the payment counter. We had to wait for about 10 minutes while someone came to the counter, but the money was soon out of our account and the woman at the payment counter said she would “pop (y)our documents over to the case worker” and that he would be with us “shortly”.

Shortly turned into two hours. Two nervous hours. I tried reading, but I couldn’t even tell you what I was reading. I couldn’t even speak to Tim because I knew if I opened my mouth I might start crying from all the stress. I kept worrying that we had missed something, or something was wrong. I kept wondering if I should go back up to Joe to ask him if they needed more documents, because I had two years of bank statements, payslips, etc. with me just in case. Finally, we were called to another window where we faced a stony-faced man named John.

From the look on his face, I was expecting bad news, but he surprised me by telling us we had been approved! He then chatted with Tim about his job for a little, and asked us how we met (in some ways, I wonder if he was checking the information on file from my first application, but I’ll pretend he really was interested). He then told us we could leave and return in a half hour to 45 minutes for the visa to be processed. I really wish they had given us the option of leaving and returning during the two hour wait instead!

We left and walked down the river to a Tesco Extra for a snack and by the time we got back and went through security again, my visa was ready! Happy day! What a relief!

We celebrated by having a late lunch at Meadowhall at our favourite restaurant, Frankie and Benny’s.

As of January 2012*, These are the minimum required documents for ILR (if settling as a spouse**):
-Completed ILR application. The bottom of the application should read “10/2011”.
-Life in the UK pass certificate
-Your passport
-Your spouse’s passport
-Two passport photos of yourself
-One passport photo of your spouse
-Three most recent payslips for your spouse and yourself (if applicable***)
-Three most recent bank statements (jointly held or singly held)
-Six pieces of post spread out over the previous two years illustrating that you and your spouse share an address. Alternately, you may use six addressed to each of you for a total of 12. They should be from at least three different sources****.

Anything else is just extra fodder and they honestly don’t need it unless you need further documents to prove residency, employment, or funds. If you are in doubt, contact an immigration lawyer^.

All hurdles are complete for settlement in the UK. Once you have ILR, as long as you do not leave the country for an extended period of time (I believe it currently is two years), you are permitted to live here.

My plans? Citizenship, once I become eligible. As a spouse and under current rules, I will become eligible on January 22, 2013, after three years of residency.

*Please check the UKBA website for up to date information as requirements can change at any time and use my information as a rough guide.
**ILR applicants that fall under other categories have additional requirements. See website and application for details.
***Include payslips from whoever is employed. If you both have jobs, include payslips for each.
****My documents were council tax bills for both 2010 and 2011, e.on bills from random months in 2010 and 2011, a barclay’s bank statement, and a Santander/Soverign Bank statement. If you have changed address, you might require more documents.
^ I did not contact a lawyer to review my application as I felt fairly confident I knew what I was doing based on my own research. However, I brought along additional information in case we were asked for it including our birth certificates, marriage certificate, expired passports, Tim’s payslips for the previous two years, bank statements for the past 6 months, mortgage statements for both 2010 and 2011, and pieces of mail for each month from January 2010 to December 2011 addressed to either myself, Tim, or both of us. If I was sending my application by post, I might have included some of the other documents.

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog.]

I had to half-ass our meal plan at around midnight last night because I had the Tesco order coming today and there was NOTHING on it!

So, here’s our sad plan.

Monday – Breakfast for Lunch
Tuesday – Steamed salmon with veggies and rice
Wednesday – Tuna steaks with salad
Thursday – something with the frozen leftover turkey, probably pot pie or Tetrazinni
Friday – Swedish Meatballs
Saturday – Cranberry burgers
Sunday – Roast Chicken

Total cost of groceries for the week? £30. In the freezer (or over at Tim’s parents in their extra freezer) we have the salmon, tuna, turkey, meatballs, and a whole chicken.

Total so far for the month? £50. Though I have a feeling after we eat the freezer down it might get a little more expensive.

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog.]